On Sunday morning I arise long before Gus and drink my tea in restless unease. I spent a fitful night in bed, wanting to believe today would be better but fearing another long day of tedium. We do not have to be there quite as early today. I wake Gus around 9 and we arrive by 10:00 a.m. On the long drive there we discuss what to do. Neither of us wants to sit there another day. Gus is willing to support me in whatever I choose, but I don’t know what I want. I am pulled in 2 directions and it’s wearing me out. I feel responsible to give it a good try, but I am dreading sitting there all day almost as much as a trip to the dentist!
We park our car and walk to our spot. A few vendors are here again, but many have not returned. I stand where my table stood yesterday and glance around the nursery and decide I would rather be doing anything than this. I would rather be doing than sitting. I would rather be experiencing life and writing than all this waiting!